Friday, November 30, 2007


Just got back from the hospital. Grandpa is so skinny. *sigh* Next Thursday he has to go to putrajaya for some scanning thing.

Anyway. Gonna go for dinner at Bangsar with me boss and all the other staff. Which is actually only 7 of us? Supposed to go Westin Hotel to makan. But then they having something going on there. So another day.

Gonna start work at Vintry on Monday with Yee Hui. But she'll be working night shift and I, the afternoon. Since I still have my other job. So can't work night shift. There's a new Vintry at Jaya 33. It's in between Nagomi and Vietnam's Kitchen. Not working there. But working at the one near bangsar, behind Victoria's Station. Come look for me! Come drink wine~ Lolx. Or look for Yee Hui. Haha. So from next week. I guess I'll be super busy and tired. Two jobs! Hehe. But still can go out on Friday night and Saturday night! Hehe.

OK. Got to go get ready de. Need to shit also. Aish. Emo!

life will never be the same..


no mood for anything right now. every single thing is pissing me off. highlight of the week. visited grandpa. and will visit every single day. it's nice to see him getting better. but. just found out yesterday. he has cancer. 3rd stage. can't cure. yea. he might just go anytime. skipped work today to visit him. the whole time. talked with him and laughed with him. when he wasn't looking. i tear. when i just walked in. i could see tears in his eyes. i feel so guilty for not going to see him.
he told us some jokes. freaking funny. then he said he has so many hospital stories to tell us. and he said when he gets out. he'll tell us all about it. he even said that when he leaves the hospital. he's gonna write a book on hospitals. i wish that will happen. it will. bah.

the pastor said that grandpa is actually ready to go to God. his name is already in the Book. he knows it his time to go. it's just that his children are not ready to let him go.

i just want him to stay on till after christmas. to celebrate christmas as a christian for the first time.

fucking no mood.

Monday, November 26, 2007


Dear To Whoever That Is Able To Save Me Right Now

I'm having difficulties right now. In a total dilemma.

Please come and take me away from here. Or maybe just fix this piece of junk I call a computer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



My assignment. My last minute assignment. Stupid damn fucking idiotic virus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Fucked my whole damn comp. And I didn't save my work anywhere else!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *sob*

Seriously. Someone. Just kill me now ok. I fully appreciate it. But if you don't want to kill me. Fix the damn computer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm so pissed off right now. Anyone talks to me now. You know la. If you don't. I don't think you want to find out right. Omg. Fucking pissed off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Someone. Save me.

Felt it

Just came to so call update my blog. Just because I have not updated for super long de. Have to hide from mingming de when she gets back. Or not you'll see me standing most of the time. Won't be able to sit. Hehe.
I have ta go sleep de. Cause need ta wake up early to finish up my oh so irritating assignment. Which I'm doing it so very last minute. As usual. Always so last minute. Amanda loves last minute stuff. All that rushing. So onz. ^^
My cousin Simone is back in the US. But now my cousin Stephanie from aussie, along with her bf and my uncle and aunty are back. They are currently sleeping in aaron's room right now. And I have to take them out the next 3 days. Where ta go?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

OK. Sleepytime. Need to wake up early morning to finish it. Rushness! On-ing~!

Found out something. Slowly dying.

Killing me slowly.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007


Off to see grandpa now. I woke up early today! So not amanda~ Haha. I didn't stay up. But I woke up. It's because I slept at 8pm yesterday. Or I won't be able to wake up this early! Oh. This early is actually 9am early. Tee~hee~ Ya. I know. Early. Wanted to buy nasi lemak. But laziness kicked in. Hehe.

Will blog more when I get back~

Mornings are soo...refreshing?

Monday, November 19, 2007


Went ac today. For dinner. Oh. I woke up at 7pm. Wanted to sleep longer some more. Hehe. Had dinner with Amelyn, Kimmy, my mum, Aunty Grace, Aunty Ann, Aunty Jane and Aunty Patty. Had crab, pasta, pizza, lala, see ham, oysters. Omg. Damn a lot of food. After all that food. Amelyn and Kimmy went ta foos. Too lazy to follow. And I was feeling extra sleepy after all that food. Sat there and stoned. Listen'd to Aunty Grace talk about her dates and stuff back in U.S. She sound so much more happening than me! Lolx. Oh well.

My grandfather accepted Christ today. My aunty went ta pray for him. He told my aunty that he made decision long time ago. Just that he didn't voice out till now. He wanted to do it too because he wants to be with us. He wants to see us again. I cried. The whole way to ac. I've been praying for years. For this to happened. And it finally did. I just feel so happy. >.<

Kimmy asked what's up with my eyes when I woke up. She thought I cried...

Been mapling~ Hehe. Julia and Yee Hui playing too! Damn funny wei they play. Hahaha. Yee Hui kept dying. Lolx. Super funny. *sigh* Lolx.

*sigh* *sigh*

Do you all want long long long long long post. Or short ones? Hehe. I damn lazy to blog long long. Cause I blog long long. All crappy. Hehe. Aish. I go play play now la. So lazy~

It's so different..

Saturday, November 17, 2007


Like this picture. We are like so cute. Er..except kevin. So not cute. Haha. Look at me. Red as usual. After an outing to Laundry. This was like last week? Ya. I think so. Don't remember. Ya last week. Oh well.

My plans for yesterday. Er. For Thursday. Didn't go as planned. Wait. Let me go read it again. OK..I did maple a bit. Then went for breakfast with Yee Hui and Simone. After breakfast. went back and maple some more. Slept for an hour. Woke up to fetch Kelly ta school. ON the way, fetched Aunty Grace *simone's mum* to JPJ to renew her license. Then drop kelly at school. Dropped Yee Hui to help me pay my saman. Fetched Esther from her house. Fetched Yee Hui from state pj. Then went ta fetch Mei from her house and back to pj to fetch Aunty Grace. Then only got to go home. Waited for Amelyn to get back from college so we can go together for lunch and also go shopping at bangsar.

Got to bangsar at around 3. Got a call from Ric to go Gardens. Couldn't go la! Stupid Ric. Hehe. Anyway. Ya. Went ta Nirvana's to eat banana leaf rice. Yum! But the rice not so nice. So sticky and clumpy. Went shopping. Was too lazy to look at all the clothes. So just sat down and watch damn try on clothes. If I try anything. I might want to get something. So. Dangerous. Ya. Then, went home then straight to work. Tried to do some work. But found out. Someone took my paperwork that I printed out. Couldn't do anything then. Lazy to print another one. Cause Don't know where I stopped checking till. Babiness. When I actually wanna do some work. The paper is gone. Aish.

Got home. Oh. Hahaha. I was damn tired at work. I mean. I've been fetching people all day. And went shopping too. So. Lolx. My phone was running out of batt. And I didn't want anyone to disturb me. Cause wanted to just lock myself in and sleep. I diverted all my calls to Mei's phone. Hahahaha. Pity Mei. SHe had all my calls. Whahahahahahahahha. Lolx. Anyway. Just reached home when my mum said we going pasar malam. I was like. oK. Fine. I didn't even have the time to have my dinner. So fine. Woke Mei up. Me, Amelyn, Mei, Simone, my mum and Aunty Grace went ta ss2 pasar malam. Couldn't enjoy my pasar malam time. Cause everyone started calling. About if going clubbing. Then had to arrange transport and shit. And as usual. I gotta drive. No biggie. After everything settled de. Had honey dew lo lo! Yumz~
So. My dinner. Oh. And Mei's dinner was honey dew lo. And we shared~! Wah. Got home. Had to get ready for clubbing de. It was already 10 something and I had to fetch a bunch of people. Sadness~

Fetched Kevin. Had ta wait for him like damn long! Freaking burmese bitch. Hehe. Still love you kevin~! *maybe* Then ta Esther's and Pei Wen. Got them. Went ta Mei's. Cause she needed to change. Wait for her also like damn long. Then zoomed off ta Maison. Reached there like 1am? Ya. Well. Won't go into details about my night. Because. Well. I don't remember shitz. >.<
But I did remember bits of everything. Like when I hit Kevin. Like freaking loud. HAhahaha. Sorry Kev! Really sorry! Didn't mean to. And for carrying me to my car. And for shouting at you. And for asking you to shut the fuck up. But I always ask you to shut up. So. Don't have to say sorry for that. Haha.

Why did I drink so much and got so piss'd drunk? Hmm..from all the emoness I had this whole week ever since that dreaded Saturday. And also. I kept drinking every glass that was offered to me. And I didn't feel anything at first. Then suddenly everything kicked in. And *poof*. Im gone.

Don't remember going ta nasi lemak antarabangsa. So wasted! My nasi lemak. Which I puked it out too. All I remember are roads. Cause kept puking. Got home. Showered. And just knocked out. Oh. Before knocking out. Mei gave me this damn nasty drink. Ugh. Then just knocked out. In the morning. Woke up to puke. Felt damn dizzy. Couldn't sleep properly cause stupid Mei took my pillow! Oh. I need to sleep with 3 pillows. Hehe. Two at the side and one for my head of cuz. Hehe. Aish. K. I getting damn lazy to blog de. Basically. The whole day today. I was sleeping. So ya.
When I get the pics from esther. I'll upload a few here. maybe. Hehe.

Anyway. It's getting late. Or early. Whichever whatever. Wanna maple awhile. Then maybe go buy nasi lemak too. *gonna get sooooo fat from all this nasi lemakness* Sleep awhile. And gotta get up ta fetch my stupid brother for drums. Argh* K. Gone.

Regret...Killing me.

Thursday, November 15, 2007


Just did this blogskin. In a way I like it. But I don't because the posts box is white. And also my side bar is also white. Like damn plain. Oh well. The whole thing actually fits my mood now. Lolx.
Yee Hui says it suits with my emoness. I'll just leave it be till I find one which I like better. And I like that girl picture. Ric. Need your help in doing up this skin. Wanna do something with it. Aish. Suppose to do assignment. I nicely go do my blog. *sigh*

*Off to maple*

Freaking Answer Me!

I didn't go out yesterday. The whole day! So good girl ya me? The only time I went out was to go to work. Kevin called to go movie. Didn't wanna go. Was too lazy and also Simone is here. And also the first thing that came to my mind was to watch it with someone else. But fuck that. Hehe. At work, Dehressa, one of the apprentice pilates instructor. Said I should go home and rest, I look sick and my eyes like damn puffy. I am sick. Still feeling sick. My eyes puffy. From all that crying. Cause of my grandfather and something else. Can't believe I can actually cry about that. Fucking crybaby shit. I meant the something else.

The whole day I've been just sleeping, woke up a 12. Fetch Kimmy from school and Aaron from his friend's house. Went ta eat beef ball noodles near Steven's corner. Yum. So long never eat de. Tried to call Yee Hui to go for lunch. But that babi. Never answer my call. Came home. Online awhile. Then went ta bed to sleep some more. Woke up for work. Went ta work. Freaking blur. Then slept awhile too. Came home. Ate dinner. Online awhile. Slept at 10pm. And I just woke up now. Omg. Having headache from sleeping too much. But still like sleeping. Sigh. I wish I can just sleep forever. So I don't have to face reality and just dream. But dreams, not good. Have to face damn reality. Ladida~

What to do now. Mei, Julia and Kevin all went ta bed. No one to teman me now. Hmm..who will teman me now wan ah. Oh ya. No more de. Pissing me off. Why. I have no idea why am I feeling that way. I shall just forget about it and don't give a shit about it. Why bother right. Right. mmhmm. Shall not think so much about it. In a way. I can't. Don't know why. Just freaking answer me. Then I'll just fuck off. You know what. Don't care. Ya. Just don't care. Will not think about it. And now. I have to think who will go out with me to eat. Oh ya. Just remembered need to do assignment.

I think I shall maple till 7 in the morning. Buy nasi lemak. Eat. Play some more till afternoon. Then call yee hui for lunch. Ya k. Wake Simone also to go have lunch too. Maybe call "boyfriend" too. But "boyfriend" got girlfriend de. Stupid idiot. Advising me to just wait. Don't jump so fast in a relationship. When I didn't do that. And wanna get ta know first before "jumping". Look where it got me. Nothing. Hehe. Mmhmm. Anyway. Ya, go lunch. Then maybe go see Grandpa too. Hopefully won't cry. But I don't think I'll be able to do it. I will cry. No matter what. Ok. Then to work. This time do work. Don't sleep. After work. I think going clubbing. But feel so freaking lazy and I'm so freaking broke too. After clubbing, they say wanna go eat nasi lemak antarabangsa. Yum! More nasi lemak for me! >.< Ok, It all sounds like a plan. Mmhmm. See if all go as plan la k.

Reality sucks ass. *groans*

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Kimmy was Robbed.

Seriously. What a day. For one. I didn't sleep after the dim sum session as you'll read or read from mei's blog. I really miss the whole Mi8. Like what the heck seriously. Our whole damn friendship is like so....freaking..argh. Whatever la. Anyway. There's so much to blog. Just so damn lazy. And the fact that I'm freaking sleepy and super tired!

Ok. My cousin and aunty from the states are back. They came back to see my grandfather. I shall not post too much on this subject. Just that i cried so much plus my eyes were so puffy. I couldn't drive. Then I just didn't go ta work tonight. Couldn't stand it. Came home. Went straight ta bed.

Next thing. Was having such a good rest. There were so many phone calls. Then somehow..I felt like there was something wrong. So I just answered the next phone call. Whoever it was. Cause I had like so many phone calls from so many different number. Kept seeing different names. Anyway. Answered Raymond's call. He was like
"Amanda, wake up." "Why...I wanna sleep. Don't disturb me!" "Your sister just got robbed. Go take her do report" "Don't lie la Raymond" "I'm serious la!"
When I heard him say that. I knew he wasn't lying. So. I called Michelle's phone. Cause Raymond said she was with her. Called her. She was gonna cry on the phone. And the grumpy in me..for waking me up. I scolded her and instantly regretted.
She just got rob. And I was scolding her. She was crying de. I asked her what happened.'s what happened.

She drove to Michelle's place in OUG near Stevens Corner. Kimmy parked at the alleyway right next to Michelle's house. She got down the car. Went to the gate. She saw that the gate was different from Mich's house. Before that she called her and told her that she was outside her house. But after finding out she was at the wrong lorong. She called Michelle's phone and told her she got the wrong house and will be there in a minute. While walking back to the car. A motorbike stopped right behind her.
The guy got down from the bike and he was holding a knife. He asked her to give her bag to him. She threw the bag at him and slowly walked behind the car. He bend down to check her bag. *my ripcurl bag* Then the other guy on the bike was like. "Let's go". They took her beg and went off. She quickly drove the Michelle's house and called me.

So there. Freaking scary. The lucky thing is..she didn't get raped or slashed or what-so-ever. And she was holding the car keys. Thank God.
So, I got up. She told me not to tell my parents. But of course I told her. That is so not possible. Went to tell my mum. She started yelling. Called my dad to cut the line. He started scolding. Ya. I get the shitz. Anyway, called Mei to help me drive the car home. Went to pick her up.

Took her to report at the police station along old klang road. Did the report and had to go to Brickfields for I have no fucking reason why. Then went back. I asked Yee hui to follow. Cause I wasn't so sure where was the police station in Brickfields.

Then went to Kayu to meet up with Raymond, Amelyn and Mei. CAuse I needed to eat. hehe. Simone followed also. Oh..simone is my cousin. Yee hui followed too. Then Ryan came too. *sigh*
Feeling so tired now. Drove the whole time.

Thank God that kimmy is safe. But I still feel like scolding her. Like wtf wei! She's having SPM and she's still going out. Dumbass. Sigh. Nothing to say. Her SPM slip is gone also. I have to take her to do her ic and driver's license. Aish. This is what you get for being the eldest. Sigh.


Tuesday, November 13, 2007

To miss or not to miss

FInished playing mahjong an hour ago. Now waiting for MsSuperSlowBatherMei to finish bathing. Damn hungry. Gonna have dim sum after she's done. Pei Wen sleeping on the sofa. Oh. They are in my house. Plus Esther too. It's like 7am now. Feel like bathing too. SHould have just now.

Anyway. Life's been really quiet lately. Ever since Saturday. Well, not really la. More like my phone's been really quiet now. Lolx.

My cousin Simone. She'll be back this afternoon. Can't wait to see her. And to catch up on things. But she'll be here for only 10 days. Can't stay for long. But their reason to be here is because of grandpa. So ya.

Love listening to my blog's songs. Gives me motivation to blog. Lolx. But makes me freaking emo. Hehe. Yesterday, got a message from that idiot. Then called him cause I did something stupid. Lolx. Not my fault! Anyway, I actually miss talking to him. He and his shits. The songs ain't helping either. Lolx. Omg. It's playing miss you now. What nice timing~ Not! Aish. Hehe.

Just can't wait for Christmas now. After Christmas. New Year! After New Year, my BIRTHDAY! Hehe. Not only that. Cause of something else la ok. Ya. Ya. HEhe. Anyway, ya, my birthday. Oh noz. I seriously have no idea what to do. *sob*

It feels weird. I don't get the daily thing de. I mean. Ya. When I wake up. Before I sleep. I will always receive it. But no more now. I don't know if I should ask what's wrong. If I should find out what's wrong. I mean. I don't know. What to do. Just forget it? I mean. Already said de. So I guess I should do the same too? Ya.

Stupid Mei. She was like...Amanda~ You can't be single like during Christmas season. Christmas is like the most romantic season of the year. Valentines Day is so overrated. You have to celebrate with someone special!
-.-' . . . *swt*
Then I was thinking.'re the one who spends every Christmas single. And she telling me all that. Babiness.
So..who wants to be that special someone? *wink*

Friday, November 9, 2007

Fucking Rants

Currently listening to my blog's songs. So emoz. *sobz* Hmmm..feeling sorta empty now. Ya. Stupid songs. So emo. But I still like it. Sob! Hehe.
My life. Weird. Mmhmm. Yup. Funny too.
What's the point of this blog again? I totally lost the meaning of why I have this blog for. I really don't know de.
The song is so getting to me. But still like it. Blah. Emoz sial.
MingMing! I'll be blogging everyday ok. If I don't. Er. You spank me ok? ONe day no blog. Spank one time. OK? Hehe. I think I shall not blog then. Lolx.

Need to concentrate now. No one disturb me ok. I don't want to go out. But of cuz. I can't stay at home. But I have to. If I don't stay at home. I'll....spank myself?
Listen to the number 10 song. Love that song! It's like so jumpy and nice. Haha. Not so emo de. But still. Miss you? Hmm. I love the hands song too. So damn cute. And it reminds me of that person. *bleh*

When I wake up tomorrow later, er..what did I wanted to say. You know what. Fuck it. From here onwards is going to be a quite emo post. You've been warned. Happy reading~!

Seriously don't want to give a fuck!

Something I've been listening to. I'm sorry.

I don't like to say sorry too many times. The more I say it. The more it means shits. But I really mean it. I really am. I guess. Let go. Bah. Hehe. What the fuck am I talking about. I guess. To that certain someone now. As to how I'm feeling right now. EHEhehaheahehaehaheaeh. Don't know what to do. Actually. I do. But. Sigh. Aish. I've always fall and rise. So. It's ok? Or no. Fuck it!

I hope this says it all. As to why I was treating you that way too. So ya. That's why. Bah.
I really really am sorry. Just kill me. I'm bad with words. With expressing feelings? Lolx. Blah.

"Love is a strong word"

And to someone else. Didn't mean to put that. Just feeling bitter. Don't know if you read my blog. But ya. It's just that. You said all that to me. But in the end. Ya. It's not your fault it all comes to this. But. After what you said. I was just. Feeling bitter and piss'd. I feel stupid and childish now. So ya. Bah.

My mum scolded me just now. My whole family has visited my grandfather. He's in the hospital now. He's been there for I think a week plus. I think 2 already. Ya. And I haven't been to visit. SHe said like I didn't have the time. like I'm so freaking "BUSY" that I can't see my grandpa. I just can't fucking bring myself to see him. I don't want to see him all weak and thin lying on the hospital bed. Kimmy visited. And I told her what I thought. And she said I was right. He looks so weak. I can't bear it. I can't see him. I'll just cry. Just thinking about it now. Fucking crying. How the fuck can I go and see him when I'll just burst out crying when I get a glimpse of him. mch. Even when kimmy was telling me about it. I was crying. Just thinking of me. Visiting him. I'll FUCKING CRY! How can I bring myself to see him and start crying. Fuck. Fuck. FUCK!
Ladida~! *chill*

Fucking hospital. Don't know what the fuck they are doing. For Fucking 2 weeks. They don't what the fuck is wrong. mch. How many fucking tests you want to do. Grandpa is so sick of your freaking dumb ass tests. And you still have no fucking idea what's wrong. Damnit. Mahkechauhai.

Problems. Problems. Problems. Carefree. Think twice.

I always said. I can't cry. Well. Bah. Huh.

Feeling : Stupid, super down, emo *as expected*, hungry, sleepy and tired.

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

One line

feeling super sick. bah. oh yea..a one liner.

i miss that idiot . . .